There are a slew of comments over at Generation Cedar on the "kissing" question already. Wonderful!
I love this one...very to the point, I think:
Do *I* kiss anyone other than my husband? Should I? No!
So, I teach my children that to be pure their spouse is the one to receive their kisses, both *before* and during marriage.
Why would we practice unfaithfulness before marriage and then expect it during marriage?
That is an excellent point. I'm not in the habit of going around kissing others beside my husband. If I don't do it now, why should it be ok to do it while dating? Of course, it's all a moot point for me at this stage -- I'm beyond the dating pool game (THANK GOD!) I've been there, done that and I'm GLAD it's over. I wasted far too many years on...well, useless pursuits.
Kissing is a demonstration of love.
That is very true as well. Yet another commenter there said she didn't understand it -- she kisses her daughter, and enjoys kisses from her; she kisses her husband; she says there are 'kisses' and then there are kisses and she fully expects her child to kiss plenty of people outside of marriage.
I'm sorry, but that comment is missing the whole topic here. We aren't talking mother/child kissing here. We are talking dating kissing. That's a whole different sort of getting down to business. If you've done that dating game routine and didn't present yourself to your spouse as you should have, you know what I'm talking about totally.
Another question was brought up by a commenter there:
I think it does, or at least it should, but I suppose that is where you get into worldly gray areas, heh? Where is that imaginary line of purity? Maybe you kiss, but nothing else. Maybe you don't mind a little touching and petting along with the kissing, but nothing else. I won't even get started on some of the other so-called options out there some folks present on this issue!
Does purity have a line?
Yes, a Christian should have a line drawn, very clearly and very set in stone, for purity. I'm not sure I'd say it should come behind kissing, but that's going to have to be a personal decision, I guess. Still, if you allow one thing, why not something else. How can you justify one line over another?
As one comment brought up, maybe the "issue" isn't so much kissing being allowed or forbidden, but the fact that dating is mostly unsupervised in this day and age. There are often not suitable chaperones for dates...I imagine most parents feel that sending their teenagers out in groups counts as chaperones. On that, we can certainly disagree. I have watched groups of teens. They would not be my first (second or third) choice for a chaperone. Remember teen parties back in the day? Yeah, there's a good choice for a proper chaperone. Leave the wolves in charge of the sheep.
We have a stand here. We have some lines drawn. Personally, I probably have more lines pencilled down than Dewey does. He deals with things as they happen, and I am a list-maker and a plannerof epic proportions. I have visions for things that have yet to be dealt with. I have a burden for my family and for their future. (I'm not saying Dewey doesn't mind you, I'm just saying what I'm saying). We aren't always on the same page, but we are generally in the same chapter and certainly within a page or two of eah other. Couldn't be married to him otherwise :o) I think we need a few more lines, but that's a work-in-progress.
We don't do the whole dating thing here, period. Our eldest once followed that same line. He understood the concepts of courtship vs dating, he understood our stand on the issue and why we felt it was important. Best laid plans and all. He started walking away from what he was raised and made choices based on a flurry of emotions without putting thoughts to a long term road ahead. Live for the moment.
That is the dating motto. Love the one you are with for the time that you have. Break off a piece of your heart and hand it over. If you are lucky, you will get a piece of theirs in return. Most likely though, you are simply giving away part of something your future beloved will never receive. You will be spending emotions that will color the remaining emotions for the rest of your life.
I don't believe it is something to be taken lightly at all. Giving away your heart, even a small part of it, is something very serious. You are robbing your future to live in the moment of the present. That is a very worldly concept.
Go check out Generation Cedar and read all the wonderful comments left and chime in with your own!